Managing Change: Chairs, Bathrooms and Dogs

The days seem to go by quickly and changes big and small creep up on us, generally with warning, but not at all welcome. With ALS, the losses are continual, just when you've come to accept one you are faced with another. I've learned quite a bit about the Five Stages of Grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. In some ways I go through these stages (not necessarily in that order) for every change we face. Some changes are accepted easier than others and with very little concern, others are painful and the loss is profound. 

Seating Arrangements
This month we've been faced with a change that is difficult, although perhaps from the outside seems less significant than others. We are faced with managing the seating arrangements.

One of the most complicated movements our bodies make is getting up or down from the seating position. It requires strength in the legs and torso, as well as the ability to balance. Patrick has required help for about the past six months to get up and down, from both the couch and dining room chairs. Over the past month it's become apparent that it was getting too difficult for me to pull him into a standing position and honestly it was taking a bit of a toll on my back and shoulders. Caitlin would often help get him up (she has more upper body strength than me) but she also was starting to have difficulties. Of course, my fears were that I'd throw out my back or Patrick would wind up on the floor and we'd have another 911 call to make. So, I've known for a while that a change was needed.

Patrick purchased a Lazy Boy chair about a year ago that has a lift in it. It's not the most comfortable chair, but it does make getting him up much easier. So, he's now using this chair. I suppose this doesn't seem like a big change? But, for us it is, we spend a few hours a day sitting on the couch doing emails, genealogy and other computer stuff together. We've moved the Lazy Boy chair close to the couch but it's not the same. We continue our routine of computer work together and we manage the best we can, but it's a difficult change.

There are options that we'll continue to consider, such as using a Hoyer lift to get him on and off the couch, but I miss the days of simplicity of us just sitting down and not worrying about falling, balance or pulled muscles.

Bathroom Remodel
The bathroom remodel took about a month and was finished in September. It's been a tremendous help, with the shower enlarged, creation of a zero threshold and enlarged doorway. The bathroom for an ALS patient is a treacherous place and we still have to be very careful how we manage his activities, however the new bathroom takes away a couple of the obstacles.

A month of change for the remodel of the bathroom was stressful on the family. I've never been good with remodeling and less so now. The constant flow of workers, noise and inconveniences. Patrick and I for a short time had to use the downstairs bathroom, this was a major challenge with his mobility issues. I'm happy to report, however, that we were successful and he didn't fall during this period - YEAH! We did a couple nights at our local hotels to have access to a disability shower. It was quite a month.

We absolutely hired the right contractor, Hal Franscioni, with Accessible Home Renovations, who is a specialist in accessibility remodels. Not only was Hal a great contractor, but he had a sensitivity and concern for us throughout the remodel which included doing all he could to be the least intrusive. We also used our favorite painter, Beth Swartz, of Gemarius Painting to finish off the cabinets.

Initially, we were going to renovate the bathroom just to make it disability friendly, not aesthetically pleasing. However after much discussion, we chose to make the bathroom remodel look as nice as possible as well as being user friendly. The zero threshold shower is popular these days so the bathroom is an upgrade and increases the value of our home. It took a little longer and cost a little more to do it this way, but I think it was the right decision for us.

See, no step into the shower!

 

New Shower and Tub

Can you see me in the mirror?

Jake

Jake

By far the most positive change to report is Jake, our new dog. He is the easiest addition to the family we've ever had in the canine community. He is 8 and we adopted him from the Sacramento SPCA. He is a tremendous source of entertainment for us every day! I don't know where he was for the past 8 years, it appears he was a dog model - check out this Mighty Dog ad.


Jake in his former life as a model

Just for the record - he sleeps with Caitlin and has few boundaries which we've never allowed any past dogs. But he's so little, how much trouble can he be? :)



Jake in his Halloween Costume - Being Carried...

Happy Halloween and Happy Fall!