Notes on Life #7

It's been about six months since the last "Notes on Life" post. The winter has come and quickly retreated, sadly leaving us with very little rain. It's been a series of up and downs with some celebrations and some sorrow. This journey is exhausting at times and I find myself struggling to pause and appreciate the now. Writing the occasional "Notes on Life" is a diary to keep track of the events, people and experiences that happen throughout this time. Perhaps someday our great grandchildren will know us... from these posts.

Loss of a Fellow Traveler, Steve Bellino

Dara and Steve

We recently suffered a great loss in our ALS family with the passing of Steve Bellino. Although Steve had ALS, his death came as a shock to us. Steve was still going strong, very active personally and with the Association. We saw him at the March support group meeting and he had just returned from a trip to the East Coast (yep, he travelled there during this year's crazy winter). He and his wife, Dara were headed out after the meeting to get their new puppy. My last memory of Steve was his excitement for the new addition. We got the news a couple weeks later, apparently he started feeling ill the day after support group.

We met Steve and Dara at the ALS support group, but we heard the name Bellino before that because Team Bellino was a fierce competitor at the ALS Walk. Yeah, we all take the walk pretty seriously - both in good fun and to help raise funds for the Sacramento ALS Association, which supports all of us along this journey.

Steve's 100th Anniversary Harley

Funerals aren't fun, anyone who thinks otherwise is crazy. But, they do help with the grieving process and provide strength to those left behind. We went to Steve's viewing to support our friend Dara and celebrate Steve's life. Dara always makes everyone feel special, she introduced us to Steve's family who had travelled in from all parts of the country. Steve was a veteran, former police officer and Harley rider. His cousin, Paul sat out in front with Steve's Harley - a 100th anniversary special. He chatted about all the additions Steve made to the bike, which were many and Steve getting "Dara's approval" to buy it.

Steve had a rich wonderful life - I know this because of the people he leaves behind. This includes Raegan, his granddaughter that entered into this world a few hours after Steve departed. Dara says they crossed souls - I think she is right. So he lives on through all of them and I know he watches over them. He will be missed.

Cemeteries, Gravestones and Family
When you spend a bit of time working on your family tree. You use a variety of resources to track down your ancestors; census, birth, marriage and death records along with tombstones, and family bibles. A number of years ago Patrick and I visited the Fairmount Cemetery in Denver, Colorado. A number of Timmons, Kirwans and Durands are buried there, all ancestors of Patrick.

One grave we were unable to locate was Jacob Ernest Timmons, Patrick's grandfather. After much looking and finally double checking with the office we found out that although he is buried in Fairmount, a headstone was never added to his grave. This has always bothered both of us and over the past few months we've been working with Fairmount to add a headstone to his grave site. We selected a headstone and when the weather warms up in Denver it will be installed.

The Oak Tree

We spent time over the past few months considering our own burial location and purchased plots with the Roseville Cemetery District. It's a nice spot with a large oak tree for shade. We met some of the neighbors and they seemed nice. Not the dead, but some of the living (although, I'm sure the dead are pleasant also). To my surprise there are folks that visit their loved ones on a regular basis at the cemetery. They come and clean the headstone, trim the rose bushes and talk with others left behind. Some bring lawn chairs and settle in for the day and others simply stop by for a chat. I was a little taken back by this initially, but after thinking about it, I understand. I believe that we never lose the connection to those we've lost, instead they are always around us. Places make these connections feel stronger, so hanging out at the cemetery can be comforting.

Visits from Family

Denise and Mike

We've enjoyed visits from family over the past few months. My sister, Denise and her husband Mike came out from Phoenix and we celebrated a late Thanksgiving. While they were out, we went to the Winter Wonderland Event at Cal Expo. Winter Wonderland is a light show featuring various locations around the world. It was quite entertaining with artificial snow falling, a kid's ride area and Santa himself.



Patrick and Sean

Patrick's brother, Sean, and his family, Debbie, Robyn and Brent came out to visit during Spring Break. We had such a great time reminiscing with them. Jake the dog, probably would have headed back to Denver with them, had he been given the opportunity. Sean brought with him a huge bag of old photos, to Patrick's delight!

We are reminded that we are blessed with great family and enjoyed seeing everyone!

Disneyland
We took off in March to the happiest place on earth, Disneyland.

There were many preparations that must take place prior to traveling for an ALS patient. I worked with Disney's Grand Californian to assure that the handicap room worked for us. Although we are so blessed to have the ADA requirements for disabled people in this country, the requirements are general rules and don't work for all disabilities. One of the ADA requirements is that the bed be lower than a regular bed. This allows easier transfer for many from bed to wheelchair. Unfortunately, for us the opposite is true, we need a regular height bed so Patrick can stand and transfer. So, I spent time working with the hotel to have the mattress switched to a regular height.

We are also thankful to the Orange County ALS Association that delivered to us a couple of items including a shower chair to use during the trip. This was done at no charge to us and they dropped and picked up the equipment right at the hotel. Just a plug for the ALS Association, your donations really do matter!

We took the family and spent four days in Disneyland and California Adventure parks. It's always wonderful to watch the kids have such a good time. I've been told by both Anthony and Christian that they would be willing to live there permanently - a tremendous sacrifice for them both:).

Patrick and I Waiting for Dole Whips!

All of Us - Justin and Sofia Hiding in Back!

Patrick, Sofia and Corrinne

Visiting with Oswald the Rabbit

Patrick and his Daughters

Team Timmons
Our Walk Team is already registered for the October Walk and we hope that you will join us! It's October 3rd at Raley Field in Sacramento. The Walk is always a good time with cool t-shirts, good company and a little exercise. Here is the link to our Team Timmons webpage:   TeamTimmons                                                                                                                             
A big thank you to Tina Ratto who is promoting the walk at Blue Shield of CA.

Odds and Ends
For Christmas, Patrick bought Anthony an Erector Set and Christian a Batman Lego Set. Both of the boys spent an afternoon with us working on their sets. It's a trio job with Patrick providing the overseeing, Caitlin helping with the handy work and each boy putting together their projects.

Anthony

Caitlin, Christian and Patrick

Lots of Birthdays over the past six months: Anthony is 10, Corrinne is 31, Christian is 7, Caitlin is 20, Sofia is 2 and I'm a whopping 48. Here are photos from some of the birthday celebrations:

Anthony is 10!

Christian is 7!



Caitlin is 20!

Sofia is 2!

I'll leave you with one of my sister's recent quotes and it seems fitting in this moment: "Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born" - Anais Nin